Last year, I had an opportunity to participate in an amazing program sponsored by the Center for Civic Education called "We the People: The Citizen and the Constitution", in which high school civics classes across the nation form constitutional teams to answer a series of questions based on CCE-issued text books. The classes form groups by unit according to the units in the textbook. For instance, the first unit in the textbook taught political philosophy and the foundations of the Constitution. That was my unit.
The teams study these subjects thoroughly and then answer their assigned questions, arranging a congressional hearing styled presentation to a panel of judges. After the presentation, the judges will ask questions about the presentation.
First, teams must compete in a district competition within their state. We were the only team in our district, so we presented and won without the suspense or anxiety of competition. Our AP Government class then won an underdog victory at states against one of the wealthier schools in the state, George Washington High School, advancing to nationals in Washington, D.C.
It was an amazing experience. The hours I spent studying John Locke, Thomas Hobbes, and other philosophers was more rewarding than anything. I found a new love in constitutional law. The experience in public speaking under enormous pressure really helped me develop my voice. My dad said that I really sounded like a lawyer and spoke with amazing passion at nationals, which really made me feel great, considering I have a great deal of anxiety when it comes to making presentations, especially in front of knowledgeable people.
Since then, I've decided to major in Philosophy in college and pursue a career in law. However, I've been thinking more and more about how on earth I could use this to minister or how on earth this could glorify God. I don't know what's so confusing. I guess it's the stereotype of the lying, exaggerating lawyer that gets me. The idea of helping guilty people walk free doesn't worry me. Those people are judged by God in the end, so man's court really means nothing.
I've also been having second thoughts on law in general. I love it, but I have no clue if that's really what I want to do. I am still interested in sports medicine and medicine in general, but I feel hindered by my mathematical and scientific ability. I still don't really know what I want. I know what I like, but not what I want.
Yeah, I've been asking God about it. Nothing, as far as I can tell. I'm getting more and more anxious about the rest of my life. I still want badly to study God academically and do his work in the world. I have no clue what I'm doing. D:
No comments:
Post a Comment